Monday, November 28, 2011

Different Ways to Connect

Connection is so very important to children.  It's how they process the world.  As infants, they need a physical connection to their mother.  It's as important of a need as eating.  But as the babies grow, they individuate.  That's how it's supposed to be.  But toddlers and young children still need to check in with mom.

Sometimes I feel like the sun around which my toddler-planets revolve.  Jack has a close orbit.  He's never very far away, and I figure prominently into his play plans.  Gus has a wider orbit, and does well with self-directed play.  But both boys need physical connection at varying levels.

Jack will bounce around the room, from me to a toy, back again.  He did this reliably last night while we were at Family Dinner at my parents' house.  But Gus was intent, caught up in his own world as usual.  Until he came running over to me and planted a big kiss right on my lips.  He told me "Mama kiss."  Then he ran over to Moviedad and did the same thing.  And then it was back to business as usual.  He made the connections he needed.

And I really loved it.

"Mama kiss!"


  1. One of the best parts of emotionally healthy kids -- they know how to get what they need. So sweet.

  2. You painted a sweet picture -- one that feels familiar to me with my two boys. They are three years apart, but one is much more close and wants mama connection often. The other knows what he wants but comes in for it on his own terms. So interesting.

    I popped over from Honest 2 Betsy, though I remember you from NPN too!